1. alone in an open zone

6:30 pm,

the blue bench,

couple to the left,

did i take their spot?

staring at the green

and the yellow,

afterglow in the background,

and it fades to the blue

and the purple,

hustle bustle

turns to a

quiet tiptoe,

a few more go by,

a lady with a dog.

and then there’s me.

so this is what it’s like

being alone

in an open zone,

my unlucky number,

15 minutes to go,

space starting

to feel liminal,

energy is minimal,

i just sit

and bare my soul,

asking where’d my friends go

as if they were ever

here to begin with,

they’re having fun

without me,

just as it’s always been.

i’m the problem,

i’m the burden,

i hold them back,

it’s my fault.

5 minutes to go.

walls are going up,

security came to tell me,

no more wallowing

in my own pity,

home so early?

how do i explain it?

pain in the pit

of my stomach,

they don’t hate me,

do they?

everything swirling

all at once,

how do i find a way

out of this hole?

guess i’ll make it up

as i go.

for now…