doesn’t feel like
i’m my usual self,
yeah i’m chill and
getting to relax but
it’s like i don’t know
what the sun looks like.
nothing but sitting by
my possibly bipolar self
after all the insanity.
i’m glad i made it out,
sophomore year was nuts,
but it certainly left scars,
some that i’m still here
thinking about often,
some that still affect
how i go about life
and think about myself.
yeah, i pushed through
and i was very proud,
but it sucks when you
bring out some bad vibes
from a growing experience.
how much better is it
really gonna get now?
will junior year bring me
more joy, love and growth,
or will i come out of it
more cynical than ever?
and how much longer
will i be writing these for?
are people gonna keep
coming along for the ride?
or will everyone just leave?
will 20 be a year filled with
blessings or curses for me?
i’m feeling scared.
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