in the back of the house,
tried so hard but couldn’t
warm myself up at all, no
blanket or jacket can get
me back, and the heat’s
gone in this lonely house.
as i lay chilled, i’m
reminded of all the
cold memories i’ve
collected over time,
when i was shoved
to the side, lied to,
told me you’d love
forever and always
be here for me, but
then you’d leave in
a sudden flash, and
years later, i still say
it hurts me, even as
people say “fuck her,”
because i can’t tell
where i went wrong,
how i made you leave.
questioned my confidence
ever since that time, and i
fear the others will soon go.
the cycle seems to repeat,
and as i fall asleep on this
bed, wrapped in the sheets,
another loyal one leaves and
it’s harder to breathe because
i want them to stay with me.
trying not to feel pain, but i’m
powerless in the process, and
i prove to be petulant while i’m
praying now for your presence.
i crave the warmth,
i want the memories
to just go away, but
they haunt as i lay,
and it’s hard to find
comfort in this house,
but here i am now, i’m
heavy in the hatred.
some demons don’t
leave you alone, and
i wish that they would,
but they’re all too cold.
life can be unfair, can’t it?
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