8. donuts for dinner

i hate him

so much

because i’m not

the one

in his shoes,

everything he does

comes so natural

and he had everyone

flocking to him,

a new girl

snuggled comfy

in his arm

every other day,

always seemed so strong

and sure of himself,

how could i contend

with someone

who had it all?

sweeter than eating

donuts for dinner,

and all i’d see

was everything

i couldn’t be.

i hate him

so much

because i want him

for myself,

every time

i saw her lay

a kiss on the cheek,

i ran off to cry,

had to hide it

every time

because for a man

to weep

was to be weak,

it seemed,

but how could i make

him love me?

barely have the nerve

to muster up

a “hello,”

a snowball’s chance

at best

he even acknowledges

that i exist.

i love him

so much

and he could never

be mine,

it’s clear

i’m not his type,

so maybe,

i should stop trying,

learn one day

to be a friend

at best,

a quick look

and he comes

with a greeting,

that charisma

has my heart bleeding,

but i try to keep

my cool,

then suddenly,

i feel his pull

as he leans in

and his lips

lock in,

the last thought

that crossed my mind

when he walked by,

but it’s true…

he loves me, too.