6. back to the wall

i’ve learned to live

with my back to the wall,

‘cause people try to act

like they know it all,

i’ve bit my lip on shit

and tried to keep it all in,

although i hold my tongue,

doesn’t mean i forget,

these days, i’ve become

so accustomed to losing,

all these late nights

where i can’t even sleep,

what’s haunting me?

won’t let it be the past,

but looking ahead,

i think i’m the outcast.

golf clap on a win,

the crowd roars at a loss,

i know they wait

for me to fall,

give ‘em something

to talk about,

whisper down the lane

when my head turns away,

then they smile in my face

and pretend it’s okay,

turn off the gaslight,

quit that manipulative shit,

laughed at my pain,

won’t acknowledge

my accomplishments.

no one wanted me to win,

i guess i’ll try it myself,

pushed away the petty,

but i’m ready

to talk my shit

if it pops off like that,

and i’m still happy

for the people that stay,

stick around when i’m down,

but shh…

everybody quiet now,

poetry king’s reading out,

silencing all the doubters.